An Honest Conversation

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Well, I told you we’re going to be in Psalm chapter 25 this morning. If you haven’t already turned there with me, please do so. Psalm chapter 25.

I was never very good at dating because I hated it. It was awful. Do any of you remember that far back to dating?

Especially those first couple dates where you’re sitting down and you’re exchanging your life story and trying to figure out how do I explain me without making me sound crazy? Did you say impulsive? Oh, impossible.

Yeah, it can be impossible. And I never did do the internet dating thing, but I know other people of my age range have, and even older. But I have some friends who’ve tried that.

Some of them have met their spouses doing that. Others just came back with horror stories of people not matching up with the way they presented themselves online. You think of how bad it is in real life, you know, sometimes spinning things, I won’t say lying, but you spin things to present yourself in a way that’s not, doesn’t look crazy, and then you end up being not what the other person expected, and then it’s even worse when you do it online.

You know, if I was doing an online dating profile, you know, hair color, thin, receding, and honestly, if I was answering honestly, I might have to say it’s retreating. I blame my children for that. But we tend to, people when they go out on dates, this is why I just let my mom suggest a wife for me, and it’s worked out real well.

And I tell Benjamin, just listen to daddy. Arranged marriage will help you. It’ll be so much easier, so much better.

Anyway, people go on dates and they try to conceal the crazier parts of themselves. How many of you have habits that you wouldn’t want to announce to somebody the first time you met them? Oh, y’all are, wow, y’all are all put together.

Okay, great. I have nothing weird or, well, I mean, nothing creepy weird, but I have habits that I wouldn’t necessarily walk up to somebody and say, hi, I’m Jared, I do this. They’d think I was nuts.

There’s certainly things that even though I, you know, I had known Charla since she was born and I was about three years old, there were things about me she didn’t know. And those first couple of dates, you try to put your best foot forward. Now that we’ve been married for a few years, she knows all about me and she puts up with it anyway.

I’ve started composting for the garden and And she said to me the other day, I never thought I’d marry somebody that would have me gathering up rotten vegetables to put in a big tub out in the backyard that rotates. I told her, it’s green acres. We’re going to be green acres.

I’m going to be out there farming in a suit. She’ll have her pearls on. I’ll get her out there.

I’ll get her out there working in the garden eventually. She said, I never thought this. I never knew this.

It’s because we try to put a positive spin. We try to conceal things. we try to give the best impression that we can, instead of letting people get to know the real us.

Now, that can lead to some humorous stories when we’re talking about a dating relationship versus a marriage relationship, but it has pretty dire consequences when it applies to our relationship with God. You see, human nature, we have a tendency to want to try to conceal things from God. Isn’t that silly?

God already knows. You know, you look back at the earliest chapters of Genesis, and you see Adam, instead of being honest with God, you see Adam trying to hide in the garden, like God didn’t know where he was or how to find him or what was going on. We see later on, Cain kills Abel, and God says, where’s your brother?

By the way, God never asks a question that he doesn’t already know the answer to. He wants us to be honest. He’s like us with our children. I want to see if you’ll tell me the truth or not.

God asks Cain, where’s your brother? Well, how do I know? Am I my brother’s keeper?

By the way, also a sign of deception. You’re not answering the question that was asked of you. Right, Charlie?

We’ve learned that with children. When they start answering a question other than what you ask, sign of deception there. We try to do that with God.

That’s human nature. We try to conceal things from God. We try to downplay our sinfulness when we talk to God.

Well, God, I had good motives. I know what I did was wrong, but at least I had good motives. God knows our motives weren’t good at all.

We can spin it all we want. We can try to pretend that our actions and our motives were more pure than they were. We can try to make a good impression with God, but He already knows who we are.

And when we go to Him in prayer and we’re dishonest, we try to put a positive spin on things, we’re not being honest with God. Sometimes we’ll try to downplay our need. We’ll try to deal with God like we’ve got everything all together.

everything’s all put together I don’t I don’t really need anything that major God I mean if you’d just give me a nice car maybe a few more dollars maybe I’ll get that raise I’ve been looking for God if you’ll I just pray that you’ll help me out with that raise but I’ve got this see we try to downplay our need with God and a lot of times it’s because of our pride or because we’re afraid to let anybody see who we really are and what we end up doing instead of instead of making a good impression with God because remember he already knows what’s in our hearts. What we end up doing is we end up keeping God at arm’s length unnecessarily. He already knows it and yet we’re pushing God away and we’re carelessly, many times we’ll carelessly offer a few superficial prayers.

God, if you’ll just help me with this thing or this thing, I’ve got this. I’m good. God, I don’t really need anything.

I’ve got this under control. We’ll offer a few superficial prayers because our our pride makes us unwilling to admit how dependent on God we really are. And how sinful we really are.

Our pride gets in the way of our honesty with God. And it’s crazy. It’s crazy that we would do that because if you stop and think about it, how are you going to hide anything from God?

He already knows. Like I told you before, we have cameras all over the inside and outside of the house. The cameras outside are my deal because there are crazy people in town.

The cameras inside are Charlie’s doing because there are crazy people who live at our house and don’t always tell us the truth about who did what. And last night, just a very simple, hey, cleaning up the bedroom is not throwing toys at your sibling. Sitting there going, I don’t know what you’re talking about.

stop it I already said we saw you on the camera not that we sit there and watch them all the time but you hear things in the other room you pull up the camera and you see what’s going on I don’t know what you’re talking about stop I know what happened, we saw it on camera you know I know what happened let’s just be honest it’s crazy to try to hide things from God because we know He knows we know He knows the truth we know He knows who we are and so all we’re doing is just necessarily dishonoring him by obstructing the fellowship we were created to have with him. It’s just like my child. There’s that lie.

I know you’re lying, and you know I know you’re lying, but until you come clean, that lie is standing in between us, and things are not right. We dishonor God, and we’re obstructing that fellowship we’re supposed to have with him, and we’re depriving. Folks, when we’re not honest with God about our sin, about our need for forgiveness, when we’re not honest with him about our spiritual needs, about how out of control our lives are sometimes, when we’re not honest with him about what we need, we’re also depriving ourselves of the ability to go to our father and ask him for the help that we need.

And James said, you don’t have because you don’t ask. You have not because you ask not. How often do we go without the things that we need?

spiritually even. How often do we go without the things that we need because we’re too prideful to be honest with God about what we do need? Can we be honest with God?

Sure we can. In Psalm chapter five, we’re going to see a prayer that David prayed where he’s almost uncomfortably honest with God in his prayers. As we’re doing this series on prayer, last week I told you that that prayer ultimately leads us to a deeper fellowship with God.

And it’s dishonesty. It’s trying to put a positive spin on things. It’s not completely admitting to God what he already knows is true that holds us back from that deeper fellowship.

So we’re going to learn today from David’s example about what it means to be honest with God in prayer. So Psalm chapter 25, starting in verse 16. We’re just going to look at a few verses here.

He says, starting in verse 16, Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am alone and afflicted. The distresses of my heart increase. Bring me out of my sufferings.

Consider my affliction and trouble and forgive all my sins. Consider my enemies. They are numerous and they hate me violently.

Guard me and rescue me. Do not let me be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. May integrity and what is right watch over me, for I wait for you.

Now, this psalm, Psalm 25, we haven’t read the whole psalm, but that gives you an idea of what he prayed. I encourage you to go back and read the whole thing for yourself, Psalm chapter 25. But this psalm was very likely written later on in David’s life.

As a matter of fact, there’s pretty good evidence within the chapter that the time he’s writing is later on in his reign where his son Absalom is trying to overthrow him and become king. Earlier in the chapter, in a part we didn’t read in verse 7, he refers to the sins of his youth. He just lays it out there.

God, please don’t hold the sins of my youth against me. And he talks in the part we did read, again, he talks about his sins. He talks about asking God to forgive his sins.

He talks about how numerous his enemies are and how alone he is. And we know from the biblical accounts that when Absalom launched this rebellion, Absalom was sneaky, and before he ever came out and openly rebelled against David, his father, and tried to take the crown, long before he ever did that, He was starting a whisper campaign convincing people, hey, I’d be a better king. I’ll give you everything you want.

As I told my kids when I taught them about this story, beware any leader who says I’ll give you whatever you want. Sneaky. Sneaky.

So he said, I’ll give you whatever you want. I’ll make a better king. And so a lot of the people began flocking to Absalom’s side to the point that when Absalom finally said we’re going to go, it’s now, and he threatened Jerusalem.

He threatened to bring his forces in. David had to flee from the city of Jerusalem, and he’s out running around through the mountains trying to escape because his life is in danger, and his kingdom is hanging by a thread. His throne is in jeopardy.

He’s in danger of losing everything because his son has led so many people to be in opposition to him. So we know during that time his enemies were numerous, and he really did feel alone. He had a few loyal men around him, but basically he felt alone.

And his references to the sins of his youth. We know that Absalom’s rebellion was the direct result of David’s sin with Bathsheba. If you’re not familiar with that story, David was supposed to be out at war.

He wasn’t where he was supposed to be. He’s out on his roof, and one day he sees a lady bathing on her roof. And instead of turning away as he ought to have, he says, who’s that?

And begins to ask questions and then asks her to be brought to him. And he has an affair with her. And she conceives a child.

He realizes he’s going to be found out. Her husband is one of his generals out at war. And so he brings Uriah back and her husband brings him back and says, you need some time off.

Go home. And he finds out he’s not at home with his wife. he’s sleeping out in the gateway because he said, I can’t sleep in a fancy bed with my wife while my men are out in a military camp fighting and dying and living under these harsh conditions.

And so David said, well, that’s not going to work because Uriah will know the baby’s not his. And so David, through a series of moves, sends Uriah out to his death in war, sends him out into the hardest fighting and then orders his men to withdraw so Uriah will be killed. And the prophet Nathan comes and tells David, you know what?

God knows exactly what you did. I’m paraphrasing here to give you the story quickly. God knows what you did.

And he told him in 2 Samuel 12, 10, now therefore the sword will never leave your house. Tells David, the sword will never leave your house because you despised me and took the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own wife. so God says there’s going to be turmoil and chaos in your family from now on so when David’s thinking back on the sins of his youth coming back to haunt him the sins of his youth are the reason why he’s alone and his enemies are all around him and why David is in danger of losing everything and so we see that David in this moment prays to God but folks he’s not doing what we tend to do Oh, Lord, just help me out here.

Lord, if you’ll just take care of this one thing, I’ve got this. Lord, I don’t know why I’m in this situation. Oh, pitiful me.

Would you just help me? Life is so unfair. David’s not offering these superficial prayers.

David’s not offering these prayers where he says, Oh, you know, God, this really isn’t my fault. This is awful. Can you help me out?

What we see is David is being totally honest with God about his circumstances. David is being almost uncomfortably honest with God in his prayers. And on that basis, because he is being honest with God, he can then honestly ask God for the things that he needs.

And he has total confidence that God is going to hear him. Folks, what we need to learn from David’s example here is that honesty with God is vital to a strong prayer life.

sometimes we feel like oh god doesn’t hear me I feel like my prayers don’t go any higher than the ceiling I’m not picking on you but if you’re if you’re in that place right now where you feel like I don’t feel like god hears me I don’t feel like there’s any power in my prayer life I don’t feel like anything happens let me ask you this are you being honest with god maybe you are I don’t know but it’s a question we need to stop and ask because what is going to pull us away from that fellowship with God is our desire to spin the truth to protect our pride to put a good foot forward and maybe God will think we’re not as bad as we really are folks God knows we’re much worse than even we know we are God knows everything God knows the motives of our hearts that even we don’t understand honesty with God is vital to a strong prayer life.

If I don’t tell my wife the truth about stuff, let’s say I don’t even lie to her, really, I just don’t tell her the whole story. And I do this routinely for years and years and years, and I always try to make myself look better in the situation that I really am. That’s not much basis for a relationship.

That’s not much basis for us to know each other. and have real conversations. That’s not much basis for her to know what it is I need, and vice versa.

My wife and I know each other. Sometimes we know what the other one needs before it’s even asked. Because we’re, I don’t want to say brutally honest, we’re not mean to each other, but we’re uncomfortably honest sometimes with one another.

Folks, how’s it any different with God? Now, He knows. He knows everything that’s going on.

And so when we are putting up roadblocks and trying to hide behind a mask and say, God, you know, I did it for the right reasons. God, I’ve got this under control. God, my life’s fine.

I don’t really need anything. When we’re trying to put on the mask of being good or being holy or being all put together, All we’re doing is saying to God, I’m keeping you at arm’s length because I don’t want to admit to you what’s really going on here. David, to his credit, did the opposite.

David was honest with God about his circumstances. He was honest with God about where he was in life. We see that in verse 16, turn to me and be gracious to me for I am alone and afflicted.

When he asked God to turn to me, it felt to him in his suffering like God had turned away from David. And so he says, turn to me and be gracious. When he’s asking him to be gracious, what’s he asking for?

He’s saying, be kinder to me than I deserve. Grace is God’s undeserved kindness. It’s not asking God for what we deserve.

It’s asking God to give us better than what we deserve. He says, God, turn to me and be gracious. Lord, bless me, take care of me, even though I don’t deserve it.

He says, for I am alone and afflicted. Now, that word for alone in Hebrew is a word that’s occasionally used to refer to somebody who’s an only child. So in that sense, it’s not necessarily just David saying, I have nobody around.

There’s nobody nearby. It sounds more like David saying, I have nobody, period. God, there’s nobody for me to rely on.

My situation is so hopeless that I have nobody to turn to but you. When’s the last time you stopped pretending you could fix it with just a little nudge from God and were completely honest that you were totally dependent? There’s nobody who could fix your problem.

There’s nobody who could intervene in your situation but him. Folks, we’ve got to be honest with God about where we are. He said, I’m afflicted.

Now, we think of afflictions as any little trial to any big trial. But here he’s describing big trial. You know, I’m kind of afflicted right now with a pain in my wrist. I’ve had to keep a brace on it. And then I was working on my mother’s car yesterday and got it dirty, didn’t get a chance to wash it. And so now it’s really hurting me that I keep doing hand gestures and yet I don’t stop.

Okay, that’s a little bit of an affliction right now. That’s not the kind of affliction David’s talking about. He’s describing being in a state of oppression and a state of poverty.

He is at a point where he says, I don’t know what I could possibly do. I don’t know how this could possibly ever be okay again. See, he doesn’t come to God with the mask.

We sometimes put on with each other on Sunday mornings. Oh, I’m fine. I’m fine.

How are you? I’m fine. And our lives are all put together.

No, he takes the mask off and he tells God, I’m in a pitiful state here. It’s such a bad situation that you’re the only one who can fix it. He’s honest with God about where he is.

You want to get out of where you are? Start by being honest with God about where you are. Now, I’m not promising you that he’s going to take away every problem that you have.

Sometimes God uses the problems to grow us to be more like Jesus Christ. Folks, a good place to start is being honest with God about where we actually are. Say, David was honest with God about his circumstances. He was honest about how he was struggling in his circumstances.

Because sometimes we go through troubles that don’t really bother us all that much. Sometimes. Unless you just overreact to everything.

We had a signal light burn out the other day. That was a problem. I could have treated it like, oh my goodness, it’s the end of the world.

Why do these things always happen to me? No, that’s a little affliction. Doesn’t bother me.

We went down to O’Reilly. Phil wasn’t there, but somebody helped me anyway. It was his day off.

Now, sometimes there are situations where we really do struggle. And yet sometimes with each other, we put on the mask and say, somebody says, how are you doing with this situation? Oh, I’m fine.

It’s all right. When inside, we’re not all right. When inside, it feels like a desperate situation.

I hope we don’t ever go to God. Now, I’m all right. I’ve got this under control.

when inside we know it’s not. See, David was struggling with his situation. He said it wasn’t just that he felt alone and afflicted.

Because of that, we see in verse 17, the distress of his heart increased. The longer he went on and the more he thought about it, the more turmoil it created in his heart as he dealt with this situation. And so he cried out to God and he said, Bring me out of my sufferings.

God, I need you to do something because I’m not okay in this situation. He was honest with God about his hurt. He was honest with God about where he was struggling.

What is it that we struggle with that we need to be honest with God about? Is there some pain that you can’t get over? Is there some sin that seems to beat you every time, some temptation that no matter what you try, it gets you every time?

Is there something he’s calling you to do that you just can’t get on board with? Is there some place where you’re struggling, you’re not okay with what’s going on? Be honest with God about it.

He might change the situation or he might change your heart about the situation. I find that a lot of times with me, he does the latter. He changes my heart about the situation.

But usually not until I’m honest with him about how I’m struggling with what’s going on. He was honest about how he was struggling. David was also honest with God about where he’d gone wrong.

This is one of the harder ones for us. God, I don’t know how I got here. I told you before, Charla and I watch live PD a lot.

We’ve learned a lot about how to deal with our kids from it. We’ve learned a lot about how to tell when somebody’s lying. You know, they pull people over and nobody ever knows how the drugs got into their car or their purse or their pants.

I usually know how things got into my pants. Maybe this is a phenomenon I’m not familiar with, but I don’t understand how that works. I don’t know how those drugs got in my pants.

I don’t know how I got into this situation where I’m now in handcuffs. This is so unfair. And they’re screaming and cursing at the police like they did something.

Do we try to do that with God? I know Adam did. That woman that you gave me, oh, he’s blaming it on the woman and he’s blaming it on God.

Because God gave him the woman that gave him the fruit. We do that sometimes, don’t we? We may not blame somebody else in our prayer to God, but we might act like, I don’t know how I got here.

I’m the victim here. When sometimes, now hear me on this. I’m not saying every time something goes wrong in your life, you did, you know, it’s a result of your sin.

Some things happen just because there’s sin in the world and it’s a fallen world and it’s not as God created it to be. But other times, when we suffer, it may be the result of our own stupid actions. I know I’ve done things that have blown back on me with consequences before, right?

And we all have. But if there’s some place in life that you’re in trouble and it’s because you sin, be honest with God about it. He said, consider my affliction and my trouble and forgive all my sins in verse 18.

When he says consider, you’ll see this word twice in the passage that we’re looking at today. When he says consider, what he’s doing is he’s taking the book of his life and he’s opening it up and saying, God, look at what you want to. flip through the whole thing, cover to cover, look at my life, see the whole thing.

I’m not hiding anything from you. Look at all of it. He’s inviting God to examine everything.

Consider my affliction. See what’s going on in my life. See how I got here.

See my troubles and their source. And he says, forgive my sins. Because David recognized in his situation that his sins were at the root of the trouble that he was suffering.

He didn’t blame Bathsheba. He didn’t blame Uriah the Hittite. He didn’t blame his servants for bringing Bathsheba to him.

He didn’t blame Nathan for pronouncing God’s judgment. He didn’t blame God for being unfair. He simply cried out and said, God, forgive my sins.

And that word for forgive from Hebrew is translated in a lot of ways. And what it means is for, he’s asking God to lift up his sins, carry them away, to bear them. He’s asking God to deal with this burden that he’s not equipped to deal with himself.

Now, is it fair for us to say, God, I did this sin, but I can’t bear it? No, it’s not fair, but it’s God’s grace that he’s willing to forgive sins. So again, grace is God’s undeserved kindness.

If we can deserve it, it’s not grace. He said, forgive my sins, because he was unable to do anything about it. He was unable to fix the wrong that he had committed against Bathsheba, against Uriah, against his own men, and especially against God.

He was unable to do anything about it. He was honest with God about the source of his trouble. God, there’s nobody else to blame here but me.

He says it here in verse 18, forgive all my sins. He said it in verse 7 in the part before we read where he says, not remember the sins of my youth or my acts of rebellion. He lays the blame right at his own doorstep.

In verse 11, he says, Lord, for the sake of your name, not because I deserve it, but for the sake of your name, forgive my iniquity for it is immense. So he’s honest with God about his sinful condition. And he didn’t just say, oh God, I made a boo-boo.

He says, my sin is immense. I am a big old sinner. He’s honest with God about how he got where he is.

Folks, are we honest with God about our sins or do we try to pretend we’re better than we really are? That’s foolish because God already knows. And we can’t ask him to forgive us of our sins if we’re not honest about having any.

Then we see where David was honest about needing God’s help. He says in verses 19 and 20, consider my enemies. There again is that word consider.

Look. Look around me. See everything.

See how everybody is against me. Consider my enemies. They are numerous and they hate me violently.

That means they hate me with a violent hatred. They hate it. You know, sometimes people will just hate each other and it’s just kind of a dislike and they don’t do anything about it.

None of y’all feel that way about anybody, do you? I hope not. But other times there are people that hate one another and they’re going to do something about it.

That’s what he’s talking about. They hate me with a kind of violent hatred that they’re going to do something and I’m in jeopardy. And so he invites God to look at all this.

His enemies were so numerous that he had to flee for his life and leave everything behind. He was in real danger here. And so he cries out to God and says, guard me and rescue me.

And do not let me be put to shame for I take refuge in you. He says, God, you are my only hope. David’s not saying here that he deserves God’s rescue.

But he’s saying he trusts in God’s rescue because God is his only hope. God is his refuge. God is his hiding place.

And so we see throughout this whole prayer, David is uncomfortably honest with God. When’s the last time that you prayed in such a way that you were honest about where you are in life, you were honest about how you got there, you’re honest about how you’re struggling with it, you’re honest about what you need because of it, in a way that makes you uncomfortable in your pride to admit it to God? That’s where we need to be every day.

Folks, we need to learn from David’s example. follow his example, as somebody who just put everything out there in the open for God. He just said, here it is, God.

Here’s where I’ve messed up. Here’s where I am. Here’s what I need.

See, the result of David’s honesty, because he didn’t try to put on a show in prayer. He didn’t try to hide behind a mask. The result of David’s honesty is that God did forgive David’s sins, and God did bless him.

God restored his kingdom to him, and David continued to be in fellowship with God. That’s more important than continuing to be king. David remained in fellowship with God and continued to be called a man after God’s own heart.

That’s incredible. For someone who’s committed adultery and committed murder, and yet he was able to go back to God and genuinely repent, and God forgave him, and God changed his heart, and he continued on in his fellowship with God. And maybe you’re saying this morning, I can’t be honest with God about the things I’ve done.

Number one, God already knows. So you’re not saving any face by not telling him. You’re just keeping him in arm’s length.

But David committed adultery and murder. You show me what God can’t forgive if you go to him and you’re honest and you seek his forgiveness. So I want to ask you this morning, are you concealing things from God in your prayer life?

Well, maybe it’s not anything this big, but again, we can go back to the Garden of Eden and see it’s human nature that we try to conceal things from God. Is there something you’re concealing from God when you need to be honest with Him in your prayer life? Are there times that you don’t tell Him the whole truth?

When you’re praying about situations in your life, are there times that you don’t tell Him the whole truth, even though you know He knows? Do you try to put on a show ever and try to look better to God than you know in your heart you are? There are times I pray and I say, God, I need this, and here’s why.

Here’s a really good godly reason. And then I stop and think, wait a minute. Okay, yeah, that is part of the reason, but God, I also just want this.

I need to be honest about my motives here. You already know. There’s a part of this that just I want.

Do you sometimes avoid prayer altogether because you don’t want to get into it with God? You don’t want to have to deal with your spiritual condition. You don’t want to have to admit to God what he already knows.

I’m just not going to pray at all because that’s the easiest way to not deal with what’s going on here. Because I can’t be honest with God about what I’ve done. I can’t be honest with God about why I’m in this situation.

So I’m just going to avoid prayer altogether.